America's best baseball blog

Today, I introduce you to the blog stylings of Minor Leaguer Christopher “Disco” Hayes, a pitching prospect in the Kansas City Royals’ system, currently with the Double-A Northwest Arkansas Naturals. I don’t know if or when Disco will make it to the Majors. I say he deserves to make it based on his blog alone.

Disco went to college at Northwestern, so he’s got a fastball, rhetorically speaking, and his posts on life in the minors are worthy of the most avid baseball readers.

You can visit his blog at http://discohayes.mlblogs.com/

But here’s a rather lengthy sample that provides a good introduction to his style and substance. Some answers to a couple of emails:

One quick question and I’m out. Where did the Disco nickname come from? If you answered that earlier in your blog please accept my apologies upfront.
Lonnie S., Springdale, AR

I am called Disco because I throw in the 70s.

I gave myself the nickname, which is a true sign you have “arrived”. I’ve done some extensive research and the demographics are really showing people are liking the nickname. 42 to 58-year-old males associate with the era and think it adds a cool-factor to an unassuming white guy with not a whole lot of “wow-factor”. The most alarming news and perhaps the best sign the nickname is working is with 21 to 34-year-old females. Prior to my nickname, only 0.3% of this demographic had heard of me. But, the survey finds that 99.1% had heard the term “Disco” so they must have since found out about me. My well below average fastball really seems to be holding me back from super-stardom with the women aged 21 to 34, but my foot seems to now be in the door, so I’ll take it. The rest of the breakdowns seem to bode well, except for both genders aged 79 and up seem to still have a bitter taste in their mouth about the Disco era. Personally I don’t see the reason why they would hold this against my “Disco Revival” here in 2009, but you know how those octogenarians can be, they are an intractable and irascible lot. I think deep down they love me, because, how couldn’t you, but they hate surveys. We didn’t look into the statistical significance of this in our study. Lastly, kids aged 6 to 14 wanted a baseball and an autograph from me equally both before and after my nickname was self assigned.

As a side note, though I have yet to reap the monetary benefits of my hilarious and career-propelling nickname, Fabian reportedly has brought in an extra $20,000 so far this year in royalties from the added sales of his 1978 hit “Disco Fever“. The extra sales have been found with “Bienenstich und Disco-Fieber” the German re-release as well.

What is your stance on answering fan mail submitted by people you know? This is a totally hypothetical question.
C. Hayes, Ann Arbor, MI

Thank you, C. I’m pretty sure I know who you are. I only have one sibling, and her first initial is C. I’m pretty sure Michigan’s only Arbor is named Ann, so that tells us nothing. Hypothetically, I’d say I can answer this question.

However, that one time when I was 16 and you asked me if I broke mom’s car windshield with a basketball IN FRONT OF MOM was not a time, hypothetically of course, to ask me a question.

And the time you asked me why the dog bit Dad and, at age 2, I was too young to know not to answer that “maybe it was cause I sticked my finger up his butt,” was also, again hypothetically, a question I should not have answered. This question, though, seems much more appropriate and not incriminating, therefore I will answer it hypothetically.

Read and enjoy.

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